Divorce VS Hobby
- Thread starter roc5288
- Start date
- Location
- Clifton, NJ
This hobby can certainly put a strain on a marriage if you
The bottom line is that I would not blame it on this hobby, or any hobby for that matter, but I would say that the blames lies on the individual. I have a friend that his wife left him because he played PS3 every night for hours instead of playing with her.
- Are neglectful
- Spend money you don't have instead of paying your bills
- Don't help around the house
- Rather drive 2 hours to pick up a frag instead of taking her out to dinner
- Have not taken her on vacation in the last 5 years because you are afraid of leaving the tank for an extended period of time
- Can't buy her anniversary gifts or Christmas gifts because you have to buy that $1000 skimmer you been wanting for a while.
- Spend more time talking to your reefing buddy than to her
- Know more about what is going on with the members of your favorite forum tank than you know about her.
The bottom line is that I would not blame it on this hobby, or any hobby for that matter, but I would say that the blames lies on the individual. I have a friend that his wife left him because he played PS3 every night for hours instead of playing with her.
- Location
- Long Island
AlohaTropics
Advanced Reefer
- Location
- Long Island
Jeez, I just had to text I Love You to my wife after reading this thread!! Those of us who have supportive wives are very fortunate. Don't take things for granted folks! We do this because we love our reefs. They let us do it because they love US!
Sent from my iPhone using Reefs
Sent from my iPhone using Reefs
- Location
- Franklin Lakes, NJ
Although this can be an excellent excuse to buy things that will automate your tank... :shhh:
- Location
- Clifton, NJ
Ditto...
My wife has her own hobby which is cooking. When she wants to drop $500 on a new mixer all I say is if she wants me to go with her to help load it in the car.
She doesn't care for the hobby but goes to the swaps with me and is willing to take a 2 hour drive to pick up frags if I ask nicely.
With all that said, I think it comes down to is how we prioritize things... We can say that relationships is a strain to our hobby or the other way around (hobby is a strain to our relationships)...but when this gets way out of balance, going too far to the left or right, that's when we need to evaluate the situation before it gets out of hand...
- Location
- Garden city
My wife always brings up my " stupid fish tank and f-ing bird" when we argue mostly because we live in a small 1 bedroom apt and my fish stuff invades her closet space! I love this hobbey and have gotten carried away spending every free minute either online or messing with the tank my wife did get very pissed sooo over the last few weeks been toneing it down a bit I think the key is to do as much as u can when she's not around and manage ur reef time just like anyother time
Also hide money from her so when u need something that's 200$ u can tell her it only cost 100$ jk I always tell my wife that but she always knows when I'm lying
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Also hide money from her so when u need something that's 200$ u can tell her it only cost 100$ jk I always tell my wife that but she always knows when I'm lying
Sent from my iPhone using Reefs
- Location
- michigan
28 years here
well i have been with my wife 28 years and 9 kids later same woman and 3 chihuahuas ..she takes all my hobbies in stride..usually they will use the hobby as a reason but there is underlying problems in the relationship yet to manifest.. so thats my 2 cents because its all i have left lol...
well i have been with my wife 28 years and 9 kids later same woman and 3 chihuahuas ..she takes all my hobbies in stride..usually they will use the hobby as a reason but there is underlying problems in the relationship yet to manifest.. so thats my 2 cents because its all i have left lol...
- Location
- michigan
hide the money
matt hiding the money could lead to a divorce you should never hide or lie about anything with your wife ..i have no closet space no garage anymore my bar in my basement is gone i have given everything up over 28 years for the kids and wife but i will never give up my tank that is my last straw when i die she can bury me in it and save the money on a casket bury me with my corals that would be cool ..now that i think about it..
ps. hiding the money they always know somehow they find it or you will get caught.
matt hiding the money could lead to a divorce you should never hide or lie about anything with your wife ..i have no closet space no garage anymore my bar in my basement is gone i have given everything up over 28 years for the kids and wife but i will never give up my tank that is my last straw when i die she can bury me in it and save the money on a casket bury me with my corals that would be cool ..now that i think about it..
ps. hiding the money they always know somehow they find it or you will get caught.
- Location
- Far Rockaway 11691
i was into reef tanks when i met my wife. i always told her i would rather do hobby related things than go hang out in bars.
she is cool with it I guess its because my fish tank keeps me at home. LOL
she is cool with it I guess its because my fish tank keeps me at home. LOL
- Location
- michigan
true
no bars here no nothing but raising the kids and loving the wife since i was 16 and now 44 and when she met me i had a 100 gallon tank with piranhas so she knew of my hobbies lol ..9 kids later and 3 chihuahuas and 4 tanks later and somehow she still loves me ahh..hope you get as lucky as i am a lifer with a life sentence ..
no bars here no nothing but raising the kids and loving the wife since i was 16 and now 44 and when she met me i had a 100 gallon tank with piranhas so she knew of my hobbies lol ..9 kids later and 3 chihuahuas and 4 tanks later and somehow she still loves me ahh..hope you get as lucky as i am a lifer with a life sentence ..
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